Scientists Go to Heaven

Sci fight is a quarterly Science Comedy Debate where scientists and comedians come together to debate serious issues in a ridiculous manner.

This round's topic: Scientists go to heaven.

Scientists do God’s work. They seek truth; divorced from opinion or ambition. They put society’s needs ahead of their own. They pursue their research with diligence, patience, and humility. Some of them even do it sober. That’s most of the seven Heavenly virtues! Surely that’s enough Frequent Virtue Points to fly them straight to the gates of Heaven. Knowing scientists, they probably carbon offset the flight as well. Surely scientists are God’s chosen ones.

Pope Francis assured us that you didn’t actually have to believe in God to go to Heaven; though it is still rude to continuously blank Him during the weekly Bingo tournament once you’re there. Plus, the atheist scientists surely have an eternity in Heaven to overcome their existential bewilderment.

Then again, scientific research brought us the weapons of war; the tools to frack God’s Mother Earth, and the Lynx Africa body spray range. Can any amount of atonement wash the sins of shower in a can away? If Richard Dawkins ended up in Heaven surely it would be some sort of Angelic prank. If Dawkins is there, is it still Heaven?

Come to the Brunswick Ballroom and enjoy a bite and a beverage as we get belligerent and biblical.